Wednesday, April 20, 2011 -

As promised in my previous post, here's my actual review of an Honest-to-God Romantic comedy....Johnnie To's new film; "Don't Go Breaking My Heart"...its actually been quite some time since I've had to catch a romantic flick in the cinema...and I can't say I missed the experience at all....LOL

As uncharacteristic as it is for me to catch such a flick, much less review it, the movie does kind of explore some very interesting relationship themes that I'll touch on later in this post.... I know, How very Aunty Agony of me...well anyways here you go:

Don't Go Breaking my Heart

“Don’t Go Breaking My Heart” is one of those full-out Saccharine-sweet romantic movies that women absolutely adore and guys need to endure. Why did I agree to watch this movie you ask? Well….one reason; Johnnie To.

Johnnie To, as previously mentioned, is one my favorite Hong Kong film directors and his romantic comedy “Love on a diet” with Andy Lau and Sammi Cheng was one of the few I actually enjoyed. Even his lesser, fluffier films like the Chinese New Year cash-in movie “Fat Choi Spirit” or “Love for all seasons” were pretty entertaining and more well-executed than 90% of films in this genre.

The plot of the story presents the ultimate female fantasy; a simple plain Jane is chased by two extremely eligible bachelors, embodied by Louis Koo and Daniel Chan and she can only pick one.

Each of the two represents the opposite spectrum of the female ideal of a guy; Louis Koo is the cocky, flirtatious Bad boy/ladies’ man who struggles to stay monogamous and Daniel Wu is the artistic, sweet, dedicated nice guy who is just completely into the female lead. Both are equally matched in the looks department and are filthy rich; so let the games begin!

Over the course of the film, the two suitors pull out all the stops trying to get the girl; giant hearts made out of post-it notes, sports cars, cooking romantic lunches, performing magic shows/ puppet shows, singing love songs over the phone, last minute trips to China to watch the sunrise on a skyscraper and the ante is constantly upped all the way till the film’s finale.

My favorite corny romantic trick was taking a diamond ring and placing it in the middle of an open dictionary with the definition of “Love” highlighted, when light passes through the ring, the shadow cast in the middle of the open book will be in the shape of a heart. Creative? Sweet? Or just too much damn time on his hands? You decide!!

Underneath all the fluff, one of the interesting underlying questions posed was whether a girl would ultimately pick the “bad boy” or the “nice guy”? Now this question has always been the source of considerable debate; research shows that when polled, more than 80% of girls will say that they will go for “the nice guy” but actual field tests conducted show that this answer may not be indicative of what happens in real life and that the females polled may have only given that answer because it was the “politically correct” response.

My actual opinion on this? Well I’ll go more into more detail on that after the movie review.

I felt that one of the weaker elements of the film was the fact that the audience was almost pre-conditioned to root for Daniel Wu’s character over Louis Koo’s character right from the get-go, minimizing the suspense of who the central character is going to pick in the end. Halfway into the movie and you’ll probably know that the film will end in a politically-correct but not necessarily realistic manner.

Thankfully, Johnnie To throws a nice curveball towards the end of the film; just when the nice guy sweeps the female lead off her feet, the director introduces an unexpected element into the mix that keeps the audience guessing; that of the reformed Bad boy. And well I guess, nothing sets a girl’s heart aflutter more than the image of a reformed bad boy; having come back down to earth, all repentant and vulnerable.

All in all, despite the fact that I was lapsing into a diabetic coma from all the sweetness, I thought that this film was an entertaining enough romantic comedy, that was rather deftly directed by Johnnie To.

End of Review


Disclaimer: The findings presented in the next section of this post have been based on copious amount of personal research, observation and a decade’s worth of emo debates/discussions with male friends.

So my opinion on the eternal Bad boy/nice guy debate? It’s simple:

A girl would date the bad boy over the nice guy any day of the week.

It’s a hard pill to swallow but absolutely true.

Those that fit in the bad boy mold are generally more outwardly self-assured, exciting and have a more dangerous edge to them while Nice guys are just that…nice.

The nice guys are always dependable, always available, always willing to bend backwards to accommodate the girl they like. More often than not, their desire to please the one they like just ends up making them look like push-overs. They present no discernible challenge (I.e. No excitement) for the female species.

The bad boys play by their own rules and never act like they have got anything to lose, plus they offer the females an enticing challenge; to have the chance of being that one person that rehabilitates them and changes them for the better, where so many others have failed.

Sure the women know that its more or less a fool’s errand to think they could ever fundamentally change a person’s personality, but that doesn’t stop them from trying does it? Everyone wants to be optimistic.

The general cycle associated with this bad boy/nice guy dilemma seems to break down into two stages that are as follows:

Dating Stage:

-Girls are generally between 16-28 yrs of age and at their prime
-Value excitement and fun over dependability and stability at this stage
-More short-term rather than long-term oriented with the advantage of youth on their side (e.g. Fun and unpredictability>stability and predictability)
-Preference skews towards the bad boy archetype rather than the nice guy
-Physical attractiveness is a crucial factor in this stage
-Attracted to flirtatious, cocky-funny style of humor
-Sees a guy putting her needs above his own as not being an attractive trait (e.g. too “available” or needy)
-Given a choice, would rather love then be loved (e.g. be with someone she loves rather than someone who really loves her)

Settling down stage:

-Girls in these stage are already in the late 20’s
-Options are now limited as they approach the end of their shelf-life
-Takes on a more balanced, long-term perspective
-Stability, dependability and security are now crucial factors.
-Looks and humor are a big plus but not a must
-A guy placing her needs above his own is now seen as an extremely desirable trait
-Given a choice, would rather much be loved than to love (e.g. preference would be towards the nice guy who loves them rather than the bad boy they so desperately love)

My secondary school friend (someone in the mold of the Nice guy archetype) once posed me a simple enough question, after a long discussion about the amount of effort and thought he put into an unrequited love affair with a friend of his, who had a penchant for dating ‘jerks’, the question was something like this: “When do you think she will ever acknowledge or even appreciate the things I’ve done for her and just take a chance on me?”

My reply after hearing his whole sob story: “Probably when she’s old and grey and her options are limited or when you’ve finally and completely distanced yourself from her to avoid continual disappointment…but you’ll probably already be with someone else by then though.”

Pessimistic? Sure it is but I’ve yet to find someone who can disprove what I’ve said to him, for all purposes and intents that’s just the way life usually is. Bittersweet. Usually the former more so than the latter.

Well, there you have it; my take on this decades-long debate! Give praise underserving ones, for this day you have been privy to the superior insights and enlightened teachings of a higher being.

Next: To get this lingering sweet taste out of my mouth, I’ll be reviewing Herman Yau’s Untold story next; the most controversial Category 3 Hong Kong film of all time. Trust me, You’ll never want to eat another Char Siew Pao again. Be there.

11:02 PM

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I'm back with another review of a film I've been wanting to catch on DVD for quite sometime now; Jonathan Glazer's Sexy Beast starring Ben Kingsley, Ray Winstone and Ian Mcshane.

I have been hearing rave reviews about Ben Kingsley Oscar nominated performance as Don Logan for quite some time now, so I finally decided to get the DVD from HMV after the submission date for my Korean marketing proposal. Well here's my 2 cents:

Sexy Beast

Jonathan Glazer’s Sexy Beast is one of the British Gangster flicks that is an enjoyable enough movie on its own but taken to another level by the tour de force performance of Ben Kingsley as Don Logan.

The plot of the film is fairly straightforward; Ray Winstone plays Gal Dove, an ex-convict and safecracker who’s retired with his ex-pornstar wife, DeeDee and their two friends, Aitch and Jackie to a gorgeous villa in Spain. Meanwhile, Don Logan sets out to recruit a team for a bank heist planned by gang boss, Teddy Bass and he wants Gal along for the job. Gal is happy with his life and doesn’t want to come out of retirement and Don won’t take no for an answer, wacky hi-jinks ensue.

Ben Kingsley’s Don Logan is the absolute antithesis of his role as Mahatma Gandhi in Richard Attenborough’s Gandhi Biopic. A psychotic sociopath, with a hair trigger temper and Napoléon complex, who seeks to achieve his objectives through intimidation, violence and sheer force of will. It’s terrifying yet hilarious seeing Don Logan brow-beating Ray Winstone’s Gal Dove into submission.

Here’s an excerpt of one of my favorite scenes in the movie:

Don Logan: What you think this is the wheel of fortune? You think you can make your dough and f*ck off? Leave the table? Thanks Don, see you Don, off to sunny Spain now Don, f*ck off Don. Lying in your pool like a fat blob laughing at me, you think I'm gonna have that? You really think I'm gonna have that, ya ponce. All right, I'll make it easy for you. God knows you're f*cking trying. Are you gonna do the job? It's not a difficult question, are you gonna do the job, yes or no?

Gal Dove: No.
Don Logan: Yes!
Gal Dove: No.
Don Logan: Yes!
Gal Dove: No!
Don Logan: Fat c*nt!
Gal Dove: No, No, No…
Don Logan: YES! YES! YES!

And another one of Don Logan’s monologues; pretending he got molested when he’s detained after getting thrown off a plane for smoking:

Don Logan: Yeah, that's what I said. There's me putting my bag up in the cupboard next thing ya know, I feel hands on me. Someone's touched me, touched my front... my front bottom. I can't believe it, I've gone all cold. I look around, he standing there isn't he? That steward with the guilty look on his face. I was shocked, I didn't know what to say. I had to sit down, I was that perturbed. Then his mate, the other one who was giving us all lessons on what we do if we land in the sea. How to wear your life jacket etc; He starts off, he starts looking at me all funny... suggestive. Now I don't know if they're wanting me for a twosome or something, I don't know how they work it. But I'll tell you what, it scared me. I was shaking like a leaf, so without thinking I lit up a cigarette to calm me nerves. I was trembling, I was very emotional and that when all the rest of it happened. It's very regrettable. Now, I don't want to kick up a fuss, right, press charges... contact the British embassy. I'd rather not pursue those channels, that's not my style. I'm not that sort of a bloke. I don't want to lose the man his job. Man's got to eat. And I'm sure he's not representative of all you Spanish people. But I would appreciate it if you had a word with him, let him know he's been rumbled. The one with the ginger hair.

Classic stuff.

Ray Winstone also turns in a very nuanced and subtle performance as the mellow Gal Dove that nicely complements the wild, manic energy that Kingsley brings to the film. Sure he’s an ex-con, but he’s a nice enough bloke who’s trying to put it all behind him and in walks this force of nature that turns his idyllic life upside down. Ian Mcshane’s performance as Teddy Bass was also a revelation, he played the role with greater restraint than Kingsley’s explosive Don Logan but exuded this quiet, palpable sense of menace that was in some ways even scarier. I’ll keep a look out for his performance as Blackbeard in the upcoming Pirates of the Caribbean movie.

The only element that I found jarring and not particularly effective was the inclusion of this mutated human-sized Jack Rabbit that seems to be a figment of Dove’s imagination. What the rabbit is a metaphor for, only the director knows I guess.

All in all, the film was a solid British Gangster movie elevated by the outstanding supporting cast and what I felt was the finest character performance given by Ben Kingsley.



And that's all folks...for my next post, I'll be reviewing a film nobody would ever expect me to...a Romantic comedy...>GASP!!<....plus the next post will also include my throoughly researched thesis about the eternal debate on whether chicks go for the bad boy/nice guy ...it'll be a lengthier and juicier post than normal.....Stay tuned!!

10:39 PM


Wednesday, April 13, 2011 -

Well....Looks like going to be the longest night yet for me in a 3 week string of late nights spent cobbling together the marketing proposal for some Aus 500-1 billion mandate for the Australian state pension fund.....the past 3 weeks has been a blur ......and April is already alomost half over... the mind reels...


Waiting for those Kangaroo-loving mofos from the sydney branch to get back to me with their inputs/changes/feedback/comments/more changes......well its as good a time as any other to blog I guess.... So as per my last post, here's my review of Ichi the Killer, truly one of the most bizarre and nastiest movie ever comitted to film...

Ichi The Killer:

Takeshi Miike’s highly-touted Ichi the Killer is Not an easy film to watch. It is a psychological tour-de-force of violence, sado-masochism and sadism and Miike is absolutely unflinching in his exploration of these themes. The film is bold, daring and pushes the envelope, perhaps a little too far in terms of good taste.

Every character here is psychologically-damaged to the nth degree; the main protagonist, Ichi, is a seemingly mild-mannered, man-child who is prone to excessively brutal bouts of violence and can literally only get-off on violence. The antagonist, Kakihara, is a flamboyant and sado-masochistic Yakuza enforcer with a Cheshire smile stretching from ear-to-ear, held on only by his facial piercings. Add in a manipulative old-man with hypnotic abilities and a body-builder’s physique, a dominatrix prostitute who speaks in 4 languages and a pair of twin detectives who sniff women’s underwear for clues and you have got one of the most bizarre collections of characters that I have ever seen in a film.

The violence in this film is over-the-top comic book violence for the most part but there are certain sequences that are so realistic in their execution that you can’t help but flinch. While I am fine with violence that is used in service to a story, violence for the sake of violence (Hostel, Saw, etc.) is a pointless exercise to me. Unfortunately, Ichi dips into the latter a little too frequently for my tastes. The treatment of some of the female characters in particular, verged on being misogynistic.

The characters themselves are psychologically rich in their complexity and Miike explores their motivations, psychosis and quirks in a substantial amount of detail in between the mayhem. Tadanobu Asano in particular steals the show as Kakihara, one of the more memorable filmic creations in recent memory, who undoubtedly inspired Health Ledger’s version of the Joker in The Dark Knight.

If I could boil down the plot of the whole film to its basics; it is essentially a twisted love story. Kakihara is a sado-masochist who loves his boss, due to his ability to inflict pain upon him like no other. When his boss gets killed by Ichi, Kakihara wants revenge on Ichi for eliminating his greatest source of pleasure but after witnessing the massive trail of destruction left behind by Ichi, Kakihara grows to believe that Ichi may be the perfect person for him, the one that can truly inflict the level of pain he craves.

Highly regarded though the film may be, the lack of any character with redeeming qualities, the overriding theme of sado-masochism, the level of sheer brutality (especially towards the women) made for a bizarre and heady brew that ultimately…just wasn’t my cup of tea.

Next Post: More reviews!.... so many movies to watch so little time and energy...

5:55 AM


Tuesday, March 22, 2011 -

And....No, The title isn't me making any references about myself transitioning to adulthood with my love of comics and cartoons strangely intact...

Whoever says I don't give Korean movies or dramas a fair shake??! While I think most Korean shows are largely formulaic and over-wrought dramas (albeit with some really cute chicks)...I am going to be reviewing a Korean movie for today's post!.....One of the best in fact...the only Korean recipient of the Grand Prix award of the Cannes film festival.....Park Chan Wook's Old Boy....


Old Boy:

If you think Korean movies are just fluffy, light, romantic melodramas with nonsensical plotlines and cardboard thin characters….well you’ll be right 99% of the time but Old Boy is one of the rare ones to fall within that 1% category of Korean films that actually elevate the medium to a whole different level.

Loosely based on a Japanese Manga of the same name, Old Boy is the second film in Park Chan Wook’s “Vengeance Trilogy” and the recipient of the coveted Grand Prix award from the Cannes film festival.

The story focuses on a middle-aged wage slave called Oh-Dae-Su who gets detained at the police station after a night of drinking and bad behavior on the night of his daughter’s birthday. His best friend bails him out and when he turns his back for a moment, Oh-Dae-Su vanishes without a trace on the rainy streets.

Oh-Dae-Su spends the next 15 years mysteriously imprisoned in an apartment. A small television set and 3 square meals of Gyoza a day are all the luxuries he is afforded. He experiences important events and watches the outside world change only through his television set.

He shadow-boxes and trains every day in the hopes that one day he can exact bloody revenge on his mysterious captor. He scars and inserts wire filaments in the flesh of his arms to mark the years that pass him by. He imagines fire ants crawling all over his body and under his skin. He attempts suicide. Several times. His bewilderment turns to rage, his rage turns to grief and his grief gives way to gradual acceptance. But his thirst for vengeance remains unsatiated.

Then one day, after 15 years of imprisonment, he is knocked out by gas emitted into his room and he awakens instead in a briefcase on the roof of a building. Oh-Dae-Su sees the sun and breathes in fresh air for the first time in 15 years.

The world has passed him by; his wife was murdered years ago and his daughter was subsequently adopted by foreigners and migrated to Europe. Thus begins Oh-Dae-Su’s odyssey of vengeance to uncover the identity of his captor and unravel the mystery behind his abduction.

Old Boy is a film that pushes the envelope, not in terms of violence (violence is not used excessively in the film but always in the most potent and effective manner when employed) but rather in terms of the themes the film explores; loss, vengeance, guilt, hatred, isolation, love and even incest.

Park Chan Wook has crafted a thought-provoking, unsettling and at times touching movie, one that actually transcends its source material.


Well there you go!....Next post, I'll be back with a review for Takeshi Miike's Ichi the Killer....one of the nastiest film I've seen...

1:02 AM


Wednesday, March 02, 2011 -

As part of my “promised” regular updates for this dusty, busted-ass old blog, I continue my look at Johnnie To’s seminal triad films: Election 1 and 2 with my short review for Election 2….

At a taut 1.5 hours, Election 2 is the one gang film that I can watch over and over again…..easily my favorite Hong Kong film of the past decade… since noboy requested for it, here ya go:


Election 2

Election 2 takes place at the end of Lok’s tenure as Chairman of the Wo Sing Triad, two years after the events of the first movie. The sequel is worthy companion piece to the first film, maintaining the same atmosphere and grittiness while considerably upping the violence quotient.

In the sequel, Lok (Simon Yam) desperately seeks to hold on to his reins of power as Chairman of Wo Sing, as a newer and younger challenger, Jimmy Li (Louis Koo) steps up as his main rival for the top spot.

Louis Koo, while not the most versatile actor around, turns in what I consider to be his finest and most subtle performance as Jimmy, under the direction of Johnnie To. His take on the character brings to mind, Al Pacino’s nuanced portrayal of Michael Corleone from the Godfather trilogy, a cool and calculating criminal with an aura of incredible violence that bubbles beneath his surface.

This “aura of incredible violence” rears its head in a grisly scene that involves hungry Alsatians, meat cleavers and grounded human meat. It’s a scene that brings to mind Herman Yau’s Untold Story (1993), with Anthony Wong’s award winning turn as the infamous Pork Bun killer.

The film work on two levels, one as a solid triad film and two, as the director’s own biting commentary on the current geo-political ties between Hong Kong and China, post-handover:

By the end of the movie, Jimmy emerges as the new chairman, only to realize that the curtailment of his business expansion plans into the China market in the beginning was all part of a ploy on the part the mainland police to manipulate him into running for chairmanship of the Wo Sing triad. They want him to remain as chairman past his 2 year tenure and for the reins of power to remain in the Li family, passed on from one generation to another, thus abolishing the centuries old Wo Shing Electoral process.

In essence, the Mainland Police’s answer to controlling crime in HK is to place their ideal candidate as the Chairman of Wo Shing, the oldest and most powerful triad in Hong Kong, thus effectively placing the whole organization under their thumb. This is essentially an accurate mirror of the socio-political relations between the China Government and the Hong Kong Triads during the 1997 British Handover, when China attempted to impose its iron-will upon the triads with minimal bloodshed. The full title of the film, “Election 2: Harmony is a virtue”, is an apt one; if you can’t beat them, recruit them!

In the end, Johnnie To’s Election 2 succeeds in being a satisfying sequel; an organic continuation of the first film, one that builds upon and broadens the existing themes and plot-points of its predecessor.

1:24 AM


Tuesday, February 22, 2011 -

I’m back again after another long hiatus….I guess there’s too much stuff on hand to be able to blog with any kind of frequency….work, outing and the stacks of Dvds and books waiting to be consumed.

Anyway I’ve been ordering loads of Dvds online for the past few months and have amassed a respectable collection of hard to find, critically acclaimed films that are not commonly available in Singapore.

Long story short, this blog is going to die a slow and painful death if I just recounted mundane anecdotes of my daily work life…e.g. “Woke at 7am, went to work, got stuck in trfafic jam, was 15 minutes late, went home at 9pm, have dinner at 10pm, surfed the net and watched ¼ of a movie before going to bed. The end.” …LOL…

So I decided, after watching this diverse range of genre films from Japan, Korea, Hong Kong and US, it’ll be an interesting change of pace if I utilized this blog more frequently, to bring some attention to some of the more obscure but interesting films I managed to catch by posting short reviews on them from time to time…

I thought I’ll start off with a review of Election 1 by Johnnie To, my favorite Hong Kong triad genre picture by my favorite Hong Kong director:

Election 1

Johnnie To’s Election 1 and Election 2 are some of the finest Hong Kong films made within the gangster genre, in the vein of Francis Ford Coppola’s sprawling Godfather Trilogy and Martin Scorscese’s Good Fellas.

While films are not as fast-paced and dynamic as Alan Mak and Andrew Lau’s ambitious Infernal affairs trilogy, what they lack in action, they more than make up for in pure atmosphere.

Johnnie To keeps the first film dark, gritty and suitably atmospheric and infuses it with a refreshingly realistic level of street-level violence that is less stylized than many of the other films in the director’s oeuvre like Exiled, Vengeance and PTU. Gone are the John Woo-esque ballet of choreographed gun-fights, replaced with down and dirty street-level brawls with knives and fists.

The sense of tradition and History that underlines the century old Wo Sing Triad and their election process (with the symbolic tradition of passing down the fabled Dragon-Baton) informs both films and adds an additional layer of authenticity and weight to the overarching plot-line.

To masterfully introduces a large and colorful cast of characters in his moody gangster melodrama but manages to make even the smaller supporting players like Lam Suet and Nick Cheung very distinct and memorable characters unto themselves. The film is peppered with excellent character vignettes that effectively introduce some of the more minor players into the film such as Nick Cheung’s deliciously over-the-top Porcelain spoon eating scene.

Another highlight of the film’s cast was the old and wizened “Uncles” of the Wo Sing triad. Retired former chairmen who represent the film’s secret puppet masters, squabbling over the merits of the triad Election candidates over tea, each faction with their own hidden agenda. The “Uncles” serve as the old guard in the film, adding a sense of history and gravitas to the proceedings and further reinforcing the film’s theme of the transfer of power across the generations.

The main protagonists in the film Lok (Simon Yam) and Big D (Tony Leung Ka Fai) are in top-form as rivals vying for the top spot in Wo Sing Triad. Lok plays the level-headed and humble gangster while Big D chews up the scenery as the hot-headed, loud mouthed thug that wants what he think is due to him, namely the top spot in the organization. Here is where Johnnie To successfully subverts his audiences expectation as the “lesser of two evils” Lok is revealed to be a bigger monster than Big D is by the end of the film.

There are no “Gangsters with a heart of gold” in this film, only power-hungry thugs who perform all manner of heinous acts in their bid to ascend their chosen field of profession.

11:08 PM


Thursday, December 02, 2010 -

Day Two

Woke up at 11 am today to get ready for work, which I guess is around 4am here in Züg. Its begun snowing over the morning here…the great big tree that sits directly below my hotel room is completely covered in snow, looking like something from a Tim Burton movie.

I set out my clothes, take a bath and get some reading done before heading down for some breakfast. The cheeses, cold cuts and waxed meats in Switzerland are great, I am planning to eat my weight’s worth in salami, pepperoni and chorizo by the time my trip ends.

After getting some instructions from a bald Swiss guy reeking of cigarette smoke and alcohol, I take a bus down to Baar, Züg where my work place is supposed to be. Apparently my workplace is in a sub-district of Baar which is a sub-district of Züg, which is one of the sub-states of Switzerland. Needless to say, I somehow overshot my location by 5 bus stops and had to re-trace the bus route back to my work place in zugersträusse based on the directions of passerbys. After 25 minutes of walking, I reach my destination.

The office building itself looks great. All sleek and modern, decked out in metal and glass. A piazza greets you once you pass the reception area and I reach just in time for our weekly Monday meeting with the 8 office branches. I walk into the piazza full of people, dressed like the Michelin tyre man and try to blend into the crowd. The head of the office in Seoul gives us an update of the opening of the new office branch and the current political climate over there, I almost manage to look semi-interested. Almost.

I bump into my co-worker from Singapore mid-way through the presentation and shortly after we get introduced to the marketing services team in Züg. My direct boss, Réto Börlin is a great guy, real warm and friendly without any airs to him and I meet our fellow team mates, Manuéla Korner and Cornelia Hüber. Cornelia gives me a tour of the place.

The place is great; big video conference rooms, color-coordinated office system furniture, a built-in kitchen for preparing client lunches and half of the third level is a really nicely designed cafeteria with a great view of the mountains. Its probably my favourite part of the place and a great place for having informal discussion sessions with colleagues. The pantry area is stocked chockfull of bottled drinks and I laugh at the fake Starbucks coffee logo on the wall; its called Wiestlibucks coffee, named after one of the founders of the firm, who’s apparently some kinda coffee nut.

After a few training sessions and spending a quarter of the day getting IT to work out the kinks at my temporary work-station, I knock off at 7 plus. All shops in Züg close at 7 pm and 90% of the eating places too so I decide to go back to the hotel and eat my fill in waxed meats and cheeses at the hotel buffet breakfast tomorrow morning.

To be Continued…

8:08 AM


Wednesday, December 01, 2010 -

Since its helluva Boring here in Switzerland and I'm stuck here for 2 weeks... well I'm back to blogging again...

I'm gonna just write about my first day in Züg and blog about any other interesting anecdotes during my trip here....and for the heck of it and to emphasise on the dreariness of the place, I'm writing the whole thing in a super-dry,cynical, first person narrative alà Raymond Chandler in his Pulp noir stories...LOL...anyway here it goes:


My plane touches downs in Zürich airport at around 8 in the morning, Swiss time….15 mins short of me finishing my in-flight movie; ‘Despicable Me’.

The cold hits me the moment I disembark as I shuffle down to the inter-terminal rail that takes me to the customs counter and the baggage collection area at the other end of the airport.

I make my way out of the departure hall and down to the next building to get my train tickets to Züg, the Swiss train schedule and location map looks more complex then Genghis Khan’s family tree…. A half dozen transportation companies offering a whole range of routes with more travel packages then I can fathom. 450 Swiss francs for a single person train pass? I didn’t know that Day-light robbery had been legalised in this country. I grab the 99 bucks special pass, a ticket to Züg and get the hell out of there.

The train ride takes 45 minutes, my `second class’ cabin is almost empty, I set down my luggage and slump into my seat. The train speeds pass countless tunnels covered in graffiti, snow covered trees and semi-constructed buildings. Railway tracks snake off in a dozen directions as far as my eye can see….everything looks bleak and dreary from my seat.

The whole place looks like communist Russia after the fall of the Soviet Union. My train reaches its destination, I walk out and it finally hits me that I’m basically at the Ass-end of nowhere.

Züg, Switzerland is a small, quaint town in Switzerland, where any semi-interesting activity of any kind ceases by 7 pm Swiss time.....shopping malls are closed, restaurants calls for last orders at 5.30pm, entire rows of shop houses are closed for the day by evening…

I somehow forest-gump my way to the hotel, Lowén. It’s situated by the lake; a 4 star hotel apparently…I shudder to find-out what a 2 star hotel here looks like here….maybe the cardboard box that was used to package Wenjun’s new 3D flat-screen TV??

I unload my stuff and take a long hot shower. The TV in the room has 43 channels; 42 channels are in Deutch and 1 in English and its CNN. Damn. After watching 5 minutes of Spongebob in German…I give up.

There’s a flea market going on in the square below my hotel; I grab my camera and head out. Fur coats, boots, gloves, waxed and preserved meat, local treats and huge wheels of two dozen types of cheeses are all on display. I even see a couple operating the amazing Cheese contraption they had at the swiss café in Raffles city, I buy myself a plate of cheesy goodness and fall in love all over again for a second time.

After that, I go exploring with my camera. Apparently 90% of shops are closed on a Sunday; it looks like the set of Residential Evil 2 movie here. I make my way across the back-alley shop houses behind the hotel and see some bizarre procession going on, with grown men and women dressed in medieval wear, capes and wooden axes being led into a 140 year old church. I take a stroll to the pier, photographing ducks and seagulls and proceed all the way to what is supposed to be the most ‘Happening’ place in Züg; their one and only shopping mall called Metalli.

Well, the only thing ‘happening’ about this mall is…Nothing. Its closed on a Sunday. Dammit.

I go across to the shops near the railway station to see if I can find anything of interest. I find a DVD shop there…Salvation at last I thought to myself….To my abject horror, I found out that every single DVD in the store is dubbed in German. Double Dammit. So are the magazines. TRIPLE DAMMIT.

I back-track and head back towards my hotel area for dinner, I settle on a small café near my hotel and order a plate of Pasta Carbonara, it costs 22 Swiss Francs, the small glass of flat Coke that came with it costs 4.50 Swiss Francs. Apparently that’s the standard rate for food here; ain’t no food courts here.

I slink back to my hotel, huddle under the sheets and go to bed, the next day is a working day and I still have to figure out how to decipher their Public transport route system....

To Be Continued...........

5:34 AM