Monday, March 27, 2006 -

A BRAND NEW POST AFTER 5 LONG MONTHS!!

So being an RP is one of the most cool- ass slackiest vocations you can get posted to after You completed your BMT....right?

Wrong. Dead wrong.

If you recalled dear readers when Last I wrote (err.....3 and a half mths ago?!)I was esctatic when I found out that I was going to be an RP.......amidst all the other horrible vocations that my platoon/bunk mates got posted to...like Riflemen and combat engineers.....I thought I was lucky as all hell to be posted as an RP....

See the thing is.....there are two kinds of RPS. Being an infantry RP is an 8 to 5pm vocation that is probably one of the slackiest vocations available....being an Air Base RP? A whole nother goddamn story man.......as luck would have it I was posted as the latter.....

Therefore instead of being an infantry RP and going through a short 2 weeks course and passing out as a full-fledged RP with an 8-5pm job.......I had to undergo a SUPER intensive 3 and 1/2 mth course to become an airbase RP.......or as they like to call us...a Field defence trooper...

So silly me....I thought that I was set for life after getting posted as an RP.....little did I know I was being posted as an airforce RP.......the Elite class of RPs......I remember the first day I reported to my new vocation.....I sensed something was hugely amiss when I reported for work and told one of the Seargents that I was reporting to work as an Rp.....He looked at me laughed in my face and said:"You really think you're gonna be a normal infantry RP ah?!hahhaha!".......the sinking feeling got worse when they made us carry our huge ass duffle bags by hand( apparently dragging the bag on its wheels was frowned upon) on our shoulders and walk 2 km to our living quarters.....and the seargent proudly proclaimed:'Put down all your stuff unpack and I'll see you at 4.30pm....we're gonna have a 2.4km Orientation run around the base".........damn.....my dreams of getting a more relaxed vocation slowly but surely began going up in a puff of smoke.....haha

To Cut a long story short....if You noticed, I've never made a single entry in this blog since I got posted to this new vocation.......that's because this three mths course has been probably the most hellish,shittiest 3 mths I have gone through....I just could'nt wrap my head around writing about all the shit I had to go through while I was still stuck in the course....now that the course has ended ....I feel much better writing about my time in the Aair Base RP course...

Now I ain't gonna go into detail about every damn thing that happened to me during the past 3 mths.....cos A lot of it has already been mentally blocked in my head....haha..but bottom line...this course is tough,goddamn tough in fact........ask anybody who has gone through this 3 mths course at the particular airbase I was posted to...and they'll tell you that what we learnt and gone through in the course is pretty much what the Sispec Cadets are doing for the 3 mth BSLC part of their seargent course...the only difference?...err.....they're better paid and respected....hahha

My friend who was in SISPEC,heard of our RP trainining syllabus from one of his friends also posted to the ame airbase as me and he asked me pretty bluntly:" Don't mind me for being blunt, but RPS are basically watch dogs.....why do they have to make you go through all these shit when all you have to do is stand at a checkpoint for a few hrs with your bloody rifle?"..........I'll be damned if I know.....in throughout the course of my 3 mths RP training, I have been trained in the use of multiple weapons.....I've done technical handling tests and fired weapons like the M-16,AR-15, The M203( M-16 with a grenade launcher), SAW, LAW (a bazooka), GPMG ( 13kg guns with a chain of bullets attached to it).......I've also been trained and given extensive lectures on the v200( anti-air craft tanks) and 84mm guns(the heaviest guns available) and gone through various platoon and section Live firing exercises,Protection of installation and Fibue exercises..........which is basically the same shit my friend has to go through to be a seargent.......oh and I have to go through a 4 day trench digging exercise called "Operation Earthworm" which is identical to the same trench digging exercise OCS officer cadets go through........

However I think the training,while some of it is pretty tough.....it's not too much of a problem...it's just like a step up from the usual training that I already went through during my BMT.....the reason why this course is tough as hell is because of the mental punishment and not the physical training.....my training officer (T.O)and Seargent Major in this course are without the doubt some of the most crazy-ass,sadistic mofos I've ever encountered....seriously back in tekong,it was physically tough but my superiors were a dream to work with....in my current vocation?The higher they go....the worst they seem to be...every area inspection by my T.O means like 200-300 push-ups minimum, every time we book out...he put's us through 3-4 hrs of pure hell before releasing us...EVERY TIME...without fail......yup and the worst of it are the Turn Outs.....

For those of you who don't know....here's how a turn out unfolds.....Imagine you're deep in sleep....around 2-3 am...then this bloody loud siren from the loud hailer goes off and next thing You know....Your seargent kicks your bunk door open and screams and shouts obsecenities at you,asking you to get the hell outta the room......so you have to change from your sleeping attire(shorts,t-shirt) into your full uniform plus boots, wear your helmet,Carry your field pack,SBO and grab your pass, run out of your room,all 132 of us has to fall in down stairs, count the strength of your platoon and report it....within 2 minutes from the time you are awaken by the siren......then after that,the real shit begins......meeting the time given is impossible so after the strength is reported and the T.O and Seargent Major insults and screams at us for 10 mins...they'll put us through 1 and 1/2 hrs to 2 hrs of physical punishment Guaranteed during each turn out......we'll be in full uniform, at 3am in the morning,doing hundreds of push-ups,crunches,jumping jacks with our rifles,run around the carpark....go back up to change to our PT attire,run down,run up change again in full uniform...etc........the shit will last for 1 and 1/2 hrs or 2 hours...and when you're soaked in sweat and phyically drained....they let you go back to sleep.......and then you have to wake up 2 hours later and fall in for breakfast.....

You should see the amount of people who vomit,faint, even collapse during the turn outs......hell the mental effects are worse......all of us become damn paranoid that we'llhave a turn out, so we'll be like sleeping with our uniform right beside our bed every night and for some of the more serious cases....some guys in my company have gotten insomnia and there was this one guy who was admitted to a psychiatric ward for "siren phobia" (he gets scared everytime he hears the siren go off cos he knows the shit storm is baout to hit)....and it turns out the poor bastard was diagnosed as having Chronic depression from serving in this course.......Me? Hell I hate turn outs with a vengeance....but not to the extent of having insomnia and phobia of the turn outs....although I don't sleeep that soundly in Camp...I usually get up throughout the night(e.g 4am,5am) .....Its a wise policy to NEVER have too Good a Night's rest....especially not in my vocation....

Anyways..There's too much shit happening on a daily basis to rant about here...So anyways here's a personal list of some of the highlights and unforgettable shit that Me and my fellow Rps have gone through in the past 3 and 1/2 mths...most of these happen during our book out days...


1.) Our first Area Inspection by our Seargent Major.....he was legendary for carrying out the most ridiculous area inspection ...so he walks up to our bunk level,kicks a chair, inpsects the table out our bunk...over turns it and our big black rubbish Bin......enters our bunk ....two shoe cabinets are thrown outta the bunk from the room......next thing I know.....Boots come FLYING out of our bunk...pair after pair after pair.......at my last count there were about 19 pairs of boots littered all outside my bunk......some of them were perfectly polished with kiwi....

Guess what?It turns out that he threw so many pairs of boots out not because we did'nt kiwi our boots and left them for display.....but because he said we did'nt kiwi the sole of our boots!!WTF?!...He said the sole at the bottom of our boots that we use everyday must be kiwi-ed black...

So when he's done checking our bunk.....we're allowed back into our bunk and it looks like a goddamn hurricane just hit it....shoe cupboards thrown on top of our beds, beds overturned,duffle bags thrown around....and Our seargent Major proceeds to check our toilets.....here's where the good part begins....

He asked the group of appointed cleaners whether they think the toilet is clean? They said yes.....and he sneers and said: "Clean? I'll show you how clean your toilet is."........he went into one of the cubicles,rolled his sleeves up and shoved his hand into the toilet bowl.....hahaha....and dug out this clump of moss/shitty lump of slime ...then he went int one of our showering cubicles opened up the drainage cover shoved his arm inside and showed us a big clump of hair.......and for his final trick....he took two fingers and scrapped the inside of one of our standing urinals and collected some of the pubic hair left behind in the urinal.....yup you read that right...

He walked out of the toilet without washing his hands and with the strands of pubic hair in his fingers and shouted:" You Guys better Clear your Bird hair before I flick them in you F*cking face!!!" then he flicked few strands of pubic air all over the corridor of our bunk...

How do people such as my seargent Major exists I'll never know.......he's this crazy,short guy with a crazy-ass temper who's a recluse that stays in camp 7 days a week and whose dream in his own words is to "Die for his country and be buried with a flag"......utter insanity...

2.) Our third bookout....we had an area inspection by our T.O.......came in, checked, screamed at us.....made us do about 300 push ups, plus flutter kicks,crunches and the usual....told us that we should'nt keep any of the food in our cupboards and should just consolidate our food into one single cupboard......he's pissed that we're keeping food in each our cupboards so he says in 5 seconds he wants every single item of food to be gathered in front him outside our bank........so we unloaded all our food in front of him and there's like this huge mound of oreos,instant noodles,jie jia herbal tea,canned drinks,biscuits,cookies,packet drinks,sweets and other snacks.....and guess what he does? He gives this mound of food a goddamn hard kick and all our food flew in every which way......then he ordered us to grab thrash bags and thow over whatever food is scattered around the corridor.....

Our seargents were around at that time and they went like WTH?!....so they told us instead throwing away like tons of food...we could just take them back if we wanted to......but all of us were like..what's the point of taking the food...the T.O godamn drop-kicked our food all over the place.....

Then we falled in below the building with our civilian bags and prepared to book out.....as usual when we were gathered the T.O screamed and shouted at us for an hour,said he's gonna wear a pair of white gloves during the next inspection and if his gloves get dirty he's gonna give us hell,this time he says he's letting us off easy cos he's in a good mood (WTF?!)...screamed at us a little while more, and at the end of it he said " Oh by the way...the CO wants me to say that he wishes all of you Happy New Year.....Now F*ck off."....we left the place at 9.00pm......area inspection started at 5.30 pm.......3 1/2 hrs of shit.....this bookout set the tone for the other subsequent book outs.......all of us can expect at least a 3-4 hr shit storm every time we booked out.....

3.) On another subsequent book out....the T.O said that instead of having a standby area...he was gonna conduct a "Standby Building"....which means we had to clean the entire 3 storey building we stayed in...from the ground level all the way to the top floor....including the stairs and every damn thing....

When he came to check...as usual he cursed and swore at us and made us to like 200-250 pushups/crunches/jumping jacks and shit.....he said the fans that were aproximately more then 2-2.5 metres off the floor was dirty so he made us stack our shoe cabinets up and clean the fans.....then he said" Kanina.....the f*cking wall so dirty? I want the f*cking wall to be all-white...not Grey and white!!!'.......so he made us take "Jeef", the white cleaning formula and clean the goddamn walls outside our bunk...every goddamn inch......we spent two solid hours cleaning up the walls....after that we were made to fall in downstairs where he did his usual screaming and shouting......and I booked out in a blind rage.......a trend that grows disturbingly frequent with each subsequent bookout...

4.)During our 5km run round base....our Seargent Major had a grand ol'time giving us hell........after running 2.5km to the emergency runway of my airbase....due to something or another that he was unhappy about...the seargent major made us go down to pumping position immediately after we touched down on the goddamned sun-baked asphalt of the runway road.....the road was hot as all hell....and we did 40 pushups...then he said he's gonna make us do static training....we had to do continuous standing broadjump on a 150 m strecth of road....which means we had to keep jumping and jumping and jumping here and there non-stop....which I though was fine.......but after 1 hour of training and jumping he said let's run the remainder of the 2.5 km...

But he's gonna add a twist to things......we'll be running as usual BUT when he shouts "One"....we supposed to straightaway go from running to doing pushups (20)immediately, when he shouts "Two..we're supposed to go from running position to crunches position and do twenty, "three" was for doing flutter kicks and "four was for doing jumping jack"....so all the 2.5 km back he was like shouting 1,3,2,1,4,3,1,4!!! and we did all these nonsensical shit all the way back and I gotta tell you I never seen my seargent major so damn happy.....he was grinning and prancing around happily as he made us do all those shit.....

5.) During our first 6km Route march in the airbase.....my T.O and Seargent Major made sure it was a memorable one.....we did the standard Route march like in BMT,only this time we had to carry 3 Jerry cans full of water tied to a stretcher plus 3 13 kg GPMGs and in the middle of the route march the T.O told us..." there are snipers around this place.....he just killed 3 of your platoonmates...I want you all to carry them back to HQ!!!"........he picked the biggest,fattest Mofos in the bloody platoon to be the victims......and four all us had to carry each dead victim including their 25 kg field pack and m-16 for them.....

Once we reached our building,Immediately without any break...the T.O shouted:"Kanina ...you call this Casualty Evac.....Evac my ass!! Your down and gimme twenty first......Bloody down and hold it there until I said you can go up!!".....after doing this 20 slow-ass push ups....he said:" wake up or not?...haven't ar ok...I want your to run 1km....5 rounds around this bloody building..GO!".....some guys were already losing it after the 6km route march with the casualty Evac so after the 1km run...they looked liked they were gonna See God any minute now...hahah...

Then the Sgt Major said :"Ok now get out of my sight!!!...10 secs I dun want to see anybody...GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!!".....he expected 150 us to disappear in 10 secs when we had to squueze 150 of us through a small gate that lead to our bunks.....so when we were unable to meet his ridiculous timing.....those of us who were stuck outside the gate,myself included were in for shit.....the Seargent Major shouted:"Ch** Bye....YOU CAN'T RUN LIKE A HUMAN...I'LL MAKE YOU CRAWL LIKE A DOG!!!".......he told us to get down on our hands and knees while we were still carrying our fieldpacks and rifles and crawl up 3 storeys all the way up to our bunks....

So we crawled up the bunk like animals after all the bloody physical stuff and when i went back, one of my platoon mates who was crawling with me...ran to his bed and started crying....he said he did'nt feel like human being...he felt like a dog..without any pride.....it was sad but perversely funny to see a grown man break down and cry like a baby...I did'nt feel anything......no shame or anger....somehow all this shit they put us through ....I was growing accustomed to it....

6.) Once more on another one of our memorable Book outs.....our Seargent Major conducted his area inspection again...this time he did'nt stuff his hand down the toilet bowl or scrapped his fingers on the public urinal...nah he wanted to check whether our items placed inside our cupboards and cabinets are standardized(e.g everyone's stuff must be the same and equally placed in the correct sequence and position like if 1 person places his tooth brush at the extreme left,followed by toothpaste,thenrazor at the right...everybody must place it this way and make sure the items are positioned in-line with each other and for e.g if one person don;t have a toilet roll or maybe a razor...nobody can display the items...everyone must be the same.)....everything went smoothly for my platoon...we spents hours standardizing our stuff before the inspection...

This was not the case for platoon 2 who stayed at the same level at us...after checking us,he went to check their stuff and he immediatley stormed out in a rage, took off his shirt(so he was like half-naked) and screamed:'Kanina bei...you call this standardization I will show you standardization!!...Everything out of your cupboards in 15 seconds!!"....so the took every damn item out then he shouted:"15 seconds Everything again!!"....he made them do this a couple of times...then he freaking chased them down the stairs and made them round around the building like 4-5 times,while he was behind them,half-naked and shouting vulgarities!!.....

My platoon seargent was funny as hell......he said that our bunk is turning into a dangerous place and that our seargent Major has lost his mind so we need to get out of there quick....so he led us down the stairs our of the building to a training shack,offed the lights and hid us there just beside the building and he said:"Ignore whatever commands i give you now.ok?".......then he started shouting:"You give me this kinda bloody standard platoon 1?! DOWN AND HOLD IT THERE!!"...so we pretended to do pumping shouting:"One!Two!Three! in a very strained tone as if we were in excruciating pain but actually we were just sitting down and laughing..it was just an act by my seargent to save our asses cos he said:"Sometimes I need to step in when you seargent major goes mad...when he goes mad.....he does crazy things".....

One of my platoon mates asked my platoon seargent point blank:"Wwhy must they put us through all this shit and torture us during every book-out? and my Ps just stared at him dumbfounded....he just could'nt answer the damn question....

so anyway my seargent major was chasing them back to our bunk after making them run rounds ard the building and when they were approaching the entrance of the doorway of our bunk the platoon seargent told us to run out and join them and use them as a cover to blend ourselves in and return to bunk....

that was when our trouble started our T.O decided to deal with us while the seargent major dealt with the other platoon......so he told us to go in our bunk and grab our field packs and show it to him.....we stood in a circle at the corridor outside our bunk,and he was right in the middle and he said:"30 seconds EVERYTHING OUT OF YOUR FIELD PACK!!".......(our field pack conatined like 7 ziplock bags of stuff like for example pack 1 conatined a fresh set of uniform,pack 2 contained our PT attire,shorts and towel and underwear,pack 3 contained utensils or slippers or whatever and in addition to this packs we also had a digging balde and stick plus a water-proof ground sheet).......

So we took everything out of the bag and he said were too slow.....so he made us put in and take out our stuff a half dozen more times and said:"you want OCS training I give you OCS training!!....take out everything......Pack 1 to the extreme left of this level,pack 2 to the extreme right top hand corner.....pack 3 in the middle of the corridor,pack 4 at the lower bottom extreme left side...etc....I give your 30 seconds!GO!!!!'.......goddamn it man we had to like run in circles around all 4 corners of our bunk throwing a different pack at each designated spot.....he said were too slow and "30 secs take everything back and keep it again!!".......so we had to rush around the 4 corners of the corridor again except we could'nt find our own stuff since like for e.g at the extreme left,top corner where we put our pack 1....there was a mounatin of pack ones all around...how the hell do we sort everything out and take back our stuff...same for all the four corners....all the packs were piled up together and we could'nt find our stuff at all ....so he made us take everything out again and place them at the different corners agian and again and again cos we can't meet his impossible to meet 30 secs timing.....we tried so hard...by our 3-4th ytime we did'nt bother running...you could see the different packs just flying over to the 4 corners,everything was being tossed in a mad rush...even our digging sticks and blades....and the bloody T.O even make us throw our helmets and SBOS at the middle of the corridor and making us mix everything up.......after a good 45 mins of this shit......he got tired of this shit and let us go......

By that time...our personal belongings were mixed up as all hell....it was a complete mess...nobody had their own stuff....they basically just grabbed anybody's pack they could from the pile to meet or T.O's timing.....everything was jumbled up....suddenly I found myself with a pack 2 with Lacoste(crocodile) briefs even though I clearly placed only Hush Puppies Briefs in my pack....even my slippers and shoes I took were not mine,my helmet and SBO was somebody else's too.........and because of this colossal mess.....we agreed to book in at 8.00pm instead of our designated book-in time at 10pm......cos we needed the 2 hours to sort our everything....

Even though I managed to recover most of my stuff ....Up to this goddamn day some of the packs taken even my own bloody field pack which was thrown all around.....is not the original ones that I owned......

7.) The worst day in camp? My first turnout.....on the sunday of my 2nd week in the air base... We booked in at 2200 hrs and went to bed.....not knowing what was going to happen at night....it should be noted that the standard course for an RP is two weeks...but an airbase RP has to go through a rigorous 3 1/1 mths course and learn the same stuff as the seargents do in SISPEC for their initial 3 mths BSLC phase....

At 3.00 am, while everyone was already soundly asleep,My platoon Seargent kicks the door of my bunk in and starts screaming and shouting at us to get out of the bunk......and this was the very first time we kanna truned out ......so we were like panicing and not knowing what the hell to do...we quickly changed from our shorts and t-shirt to our army uniform,carried all our damn stuff:field pack,helmet,Sbo and ran straight down three storeys to the ground floor to fall in....I did'nt even have time to put on my specs when they turned us out...so I was like completely screwed...my vision was blurry and I could'nt see shit....

As we ran down the three storeys...there was a seargent stationed at every single section of the staricase shouting and screaming at us like they've lost their minds......so everyone gathered and fallin and our appointed IC begain counting our strength in order to report to the seargents the number of trainees who were present.....because everybody had just been scared awake..our movement was slow and our senses were all wonky...so it took a long time to count the correct strength of the platoon......so we kanna push-ups,crunches,flutter kicks with our field packs still on and we had to do pumping with field pack and hold it there becasue the sgts said the strenght has nt been reported and that we would suffer while they waited......

Finally all the platoon ICs of the 4 platoons reported the strength and then...our T.O addressed us...I still remember his words...clear as day..as he screamed at us:"Gentlemen.....you know what week is this week or not? THIS IS END OF HONEYMOON WEEK AND BEGINNING OF HELL WEEK!!!!!KANINA .....your supposed to fall in within 3 mins and yet you take 15 mins to fall in?! F*CKED UP!!!! From thsi day onwards...ITS HELL FOR ALL OF YOU!!!"

Next thing I knew we were made to run around buildings,do hundreds of push-ups,crunches,flutter kickc,jumping jacks,carry our field pack above our heads and hold it there......then they decided to do a an equipment check to ensure we brought down the necessary items....one of the necessary items was to have two full water bottles......the seargents went ard checking our bottles and it turned out some of them did'nt fill the bottles up completely....so the seargent told everyone to take their two goddamn bottles and empty the entire two bottles of water all over our field packs and sbo and helmet....then we were told to do pumping and crunces on the super wet road where we fall in.....

after 3 solid hours of screaming,shouting and physical punishment....they let us go back and sleep for a few more hours beofre falling in for breakfast the next day......this was my very first turn out and I'll never forget it...it set the bar high for future turn outs and after that day...Never did I dare to sleep too soundly in camp ever again.....at the end of it....My uniform was soaked in sweat and I just collapsed onto my bed when I went back to bunk...

This were some of the more memorable stuff....but there are lots of other shit...basically we were put through all kinds of shit on a daily basis...nonsense like our sports day,where we were told was going to be a fun day where we could play games,.......they took us to the airforce school stadium and dropped us this bomb shell...No contact sports allowed, so that means no soccer,basketball,rugby or any other damn sports worth playing....so they ended up making us run and sprint on the track all day long for our "Sports day" while our seargent major shouted words of encouragement like "chao Ch** By*...Run faster you Bloody Gu Niang!!!!".....also I remembered the time we went for our range and since the estimated number of people who got the marksman badge were lesser then the number the T.O wanted...he turned us out in the middle of the night and punished us for his (in his words).."loss of face"..... oh and there was the delightful toime,when straight after dinner the T.O marched us to the chin up bar and said I want each platoon to clock 2400 pull-ups ......there were like 35 in each platoon.....but the number was IMPOSSIBLE to accomplish...so the T.O said we could'nt go back to bunk until we compelted the 24oo pull-ups...so everybody tried to do as many pull ups as they could over and over and overa again..until our hands were numb...we took roughly 3 hrs to finish doing the 24oo push ups while our TO stood near the chin-up bar and insulted all the obese guys who could'nt do any push-ups...

When it finally came to our POP,pssing out parade for our RP course.....it was not a happy event like during my BMT(hell you can see I dun even wanna bother taking much photos or uploading them).........honestly we just wanted to get out of the course and for the whole thing to just be over with quick......we were not at all motivated,happy or anything.......we just wanted all the shit to end...all of us unanimously agreed that if they had cancelled the entire Passing Out Parade adn gave us the day off....we'll be more then happy.......so anyways for the entire 2 weeks leading up to the parade we practiced our drills constantly right up the day our parents came, when they arrived at 4.30 pm in the stadium...we were still being made to rehearse one last time...when it all ended....everybody was relieved as hell..

The main reason nobody was very excited about the POP was because straight away after our POP....we were gonna have to go through the toughest part....2 weeks confinement for our OJT(On the job training) where we would get Turned out 3-4 times EVERY day for the duration of the 2 weeks.....

OJT.........

Imagine how would you feel.....if after passing out of the course and going through 3 moths of shit.......another 2 weeks of pure torture awaits you...I have to say this man.....I'm a very laidback and easy going person...I don't take things too seriously....but that two weeks OJT/Confinement in camp was probably one of the saddest 2 weeks of my life...my morale was absolutely zero......many of us nearly went bonkers during the two weeks.....

TWO weeks of pure punishment and turn outs and in between all this shit we still had to do our duties standing guard at the base and studying for our 3 hr long test and memorize the 18 important people in our base, some of whom had 2-3 cars minimum ....so we had to memorise 50 car plates and the people who owned them,their faces,names and ranks and regurgitate everything out...

The first day of OJT,we were led to our new living quarters.....or squatters....we stayed in a former store room that has not been opened for years....with light up signs adorning the walls of the room like "Evacuate room immediately" and "gas discharged"...wth was this room used for I don not know.....for my platoon we stayed in the inner most part of the storeroom......so it was like a room inside a room........my quarters had no fan,no windows,no ventilation nothing............it was seriously HOT as hell and it was sometimes quite difficult to breathe cos of the lack of ventilation and all the dust....plus if you off all the lights in my platoon's room even in the bright afternoon like 1pm......it will still be completeley dark ,so dark that you can't see your own bloody hand when u place it in front of you......its no exaggeration becos we are so deep inside the store room that there is no sunlight at all.....

The best part? 138 of us squeezed into that goddamned cramped store room for our OJT for the first 5 days...there were beds all around,people did'nt have cupboards and beds and pillows and blankets of their own and had to share everything due to the lack of space and beds.....there was barely enough room to walk with all the beds all arranged side by side inside and people lying around...........the beds were just big pieces of foam and the bedsheet were white shits without any elastic ends(kinda like a table cloth)..me and two other guys had to pull two beds together and three of us had to sleep on the bed....I did'nt even have the room to shift my body and had to turn at a certian degree,plus having to be so close to the smell of their bloody feet ain';t helping much....it was horrible...plus the heat inside was so bad.....that we were sweating like hell inside and the whole place was cramped and smelled like stale,sour sweat...

the condition of the bunk worsened because....during our OJT, we kep getting turned out...so getting turned out meant being physically punished for 2-3 hrs every night and sweating like shit.......so it would be stupid to keep changing uniforms because they all gonna be dirty anyways because of the non-stop turn-outs......so we just kept using the same,smelly uniform for the turnout.....and furthermore we had to put that smelly uniform near our bed in the small bunk because the turnout could be at ANY time of the day...so we could'nt afford to let our uniform be sunned because we had to make sure we alwys had our uniforms near us to change for the turnout.......all this plus the small,constrained spaces,the extreme heat and the lack of ventilation created a serious problem....the room was hot like hell and smelt so damn bad that there were actually house flies in our bunk.....

If that level of bad hygiene was good enough...we were told we could not use the current toilets and cubicles our older Senior RP used and had to use the smelly,old toilet at the other side......there were 6 cubicles to bathe....the water pressure was about as strong as having a 5 year old piss at you and you had to like almost touch the wall before you could feel any of the water from the shower head falling on you and the 6 cubicles reeked heavily of the smell of urine...........the cubicle for pooping was worse...we were given 2 cubicles and one could not be flushed and somebody left a pile of shit there....so 138 ended up having to share one cubicle to poop............needless to say I did'nt use the toilet much........it was only after our RSM came and saw the putrid and horrible living conditions of our bunk that changes were made......like we were allowed to use the main toilets for peeing and pooping but not bathing, we were given industrial fans to help improve the ventilation and reduce the temperature of the bunks......the first few days were really,really horrible....

The living conditions were horrible but nothing compared to the turn-outs.......2-3 times a day,at any time......138 people must change from their sleeping attire to full uniform and grab all their helmet and SBO,throw their pass on the table ,run into the armory and take their rifles and fall in within 2 mins.........138 pple fallin in in 2 mins?impossible.......we were really getting psychologically disturbed by the bloody siren they used to turn us out......scared like shit, in fact one of the guys got sent to the medical centre for a mental check up because whenever he hears sirens he will just get hysterical,he told the doctors he had a phobia of the siren and the doctor at last diagnosed him as suffering from chronic depression due to the tough training......

I'm not sure anybody knows what its like to constantly live in fear of the turn outs day in day out,any time of the day for two straight weeks.......its like you know that being turned out is inevitable and you just wait all day long for the shit to hit the fan.......it's a really shitty feeling.....because you know you could be turned out be it night or day.....any time.....we are at their mercy.........so many of us were scared to even go poop in the toilet or bathe .....because IMAGINE that your like shitting halfway or in the shower covered in soap and you get turned out......there is NO way in hell you can run out from the toilet in time,go back to your bunk and grab all your stuff and fall in within 2 minutes.....and if you're late...you're gonna be labeled as a weak link and see as the asshole who's getting your fellow platoon mates into trouble....because no matter how fast we fall in during turn outs, we still get badly punished but if anybody is severely late like 4-5 minutes late.....we're gonna get hell.....

So me being the terribly intellectual individual I am...hahaha....I figured a way that I could bathe and poop with a peace of mind.......Its a SAF rule that all army personnel are not to be engaged in any physical activities within 1 hour after consuming their meals...so whenever its lunch....I will eat it quick and whatever remainder time I quickly bathe or poop.........and I try to get things done in the minimum amount of time.....luckily my plan was successful and I never got caught with my pants down...LITERALLLY.....during a turnout...hahaha

So anyways these constant turnouts have seriously screwed with my head.....nowadays I can't sleep soundly....and I'm especially sensitive to any sounds or noises......once the sergeants press the siren and turn us out...I IMMEDIATELY spring outta bed and wear my boots without any delay.......I remember several funny turnouts.......there was once we turned ourselves out...because sometimes a seargent would just approach some random guy sleeping and whisper P1(Priority one..the code name for turn outs) in his ear and he would get up from bed and scream for the rest of us to get up....there was once this guy,he was sleeping and he just suddenly woke up and scream "P1!!"......next thing you know...everybody is screaming "p1" and falling in.....and it turns out to be a false alarm and that guy was just under too much mental stress or something.....hahaha...funny shit...

Also one of the scariest turn outs was a non-turn out.......normally we know that for the 2 weeks confinement ..we would get turned out every day.......but there was this one day whgere everything was so damn peaceful...no turn outs...nothing....and when it was time to sleep....nobody could sleep...so great was our psychological fear of turn outs that we would'nt let ourselves believe that there would be no turn outs and sleep in peace........so everyone was awake that whole night....just waiting for those sadistic bastards to freaking turn us out and get it over with......but it did'nt happen....and we just did'nt sleep the whole night.......anticipating the turn out that never came....

Another funny turn out was when they turned us out and made us take our field packs out and unload everything from the field pack on the floor......its the same usual game where they make you take everything out and pack everything in and keep repeating it over and over again.....and the seargent shouted:"I WANT EVERYTHING IN WITHIN 1 MIN 30 SECS!!!!".........hahah...I turned to my friend beside me and started laughing.....1 min 30 secs??!!hhahaha.....you dumb ass chicken shit.....we kanna played by our T.O so many times during EVERY book out that we could pack everything inside the bag in less then 30 secs...or 30 secs at most......1 min 30 secs? I could bloody pack my bag,run to the vending machine and drink a can of soya bean in that time...hahaha...so the seargents were expecting us to not meet the timing and so they could make us do it over and over again.....but no such luck for them....we packed everything in,under 30 secs and they look at us in shock and told us to go keep our field packs back in our bunk....haha

The scariest thing with the turnouts would be the casualties......many asthmatic guys often had asthma attacks after turnouts,I've also seen people collapsing(the Platoon Best trainee in fact) and one of my bunk mates had a panic attack in the middle of the night and me and two other guys had to carry him out of the bunk for medical attention.....he was hospitalized for a day.....sad sad case....

And so it finally ended...2 weeks of hell......the day I officially completed my training and became an RP was such a goddamn happy day for me........the seargents turned from complete monsters to friendly people....and they gave us all the privileges that we were denied during training like buying drinks from the vending machine,buying food from the mini mart,playing ping pong...and I was so damn happy.......after all my hard work.....I attended EVERY single major exercise and had a perfect attendance record,I never fall out for even a single activity even minor ones like our basic morning exercise....I have suffered through EVERY single turnout...I have done EVERY single push up that was ever done during the 3 1/2 mth course.....finally after all this I thought I would get the stability I wanted...I thought I could just finally become and RP and enjoy my off days every week....

Needless to say...by now you should know that things never work out my way very often......after working as an RP for an entire mth......we were informed that the other 3 of our sister air bases had a serious lack of manpower and that my base has the highest amount of manpower and was therefore obligated to help the other bases......my base sent out 70 of us on loan for 4 and 1/2 mths to the other 3 bases.........once again I would be uprooted from where I am and thrown into some new working environment again......

The new base I'm posted to? Its near my house.......but its the oldest,filthiest air base in singapore....the only colonial styled base in Singapore,the buildings are all remnants from world war 2........the off system totally sucks compared to my current base......the base's RPS treat us like total aliens even though we're there to help their asses and my new platoon seargent is a goddamn commando/special forces guy......just my luck...oh and my bunk mate who sleeps beside me is a LITERALLY semi-retarded guy with a chest full of hair,scary ass looking nipples who doesn't bathe and enjoy eating is own boogers...no joke.....he's the complete package man....talk about kicking a man while he's down...

4 1/2 mths of more shit.......the off day system really sucks so I wun be home like 60% of the time under their schedule......4 1/2 mths before I can regain the stability that I had barely grasped during my 1 mth as an official RP in my air base.....the same stability that was ripped away from me.....by then I would have already been in the army for a year....haiz.....what to do....in SAF....your fate is not in your control....they can just toss and chuck you anywhere they want....you can't control your own fate....its not like studying where if you study hard and get good grades you can go to the places you want...in the army.....putting in hardwork dun mean shit...in fact some of the laziest people are the ones who get the good jobs.....(for e.g those who did'nt work hard and performed poorly during our course were posted out of our base to lim chu kang camp while the rest that showed effort and hardwork were retained......turns out that those lazy bastards were posted to a 8-5pm job at their new vocation.....there's no justice in this world I'll tell you that).....well I anxiously await the day I return to my actual air base...by then I would be a senior RP already.....and should be able to teach and train the next bath of RPs...

Haiz...My blog is so depressing.....all doom and gloom.....I get depressed just writing all this shit down much less reading it....I just hope I can get a decent break one day.....things never seem to go my way.....there's this saying"Nice guys finish last in life"........that's so true man....I've always had to work hard over everything be it studies or what have you and I've always been nicer to people then they are to me.....but doesn't mean that if you're nice and hardworking.....things will go your way and you'll get good karma.....nah.....I never done anything bad to anyone else in my life...quite the opposite in fact and You don't see me catching any breaks in life...(Methinks that's why I developed this laidback,realxed attitude and this cynical sense of humor...otherwise I would just be like pretty damn negative all the time)..I don't get the good jobs or vocations,I don't sail through everyday life smoothy and without a care in the world.....hell I never even won any lucky draw or contest in my life....in fact its never been as clear to me,as it has in army....that some really lazy,nasty people......some of them are like the freaking scum of the earth....are the ones who get the lucky breaks........its some KARMIC,quasi-cosmic anomaly that I cannot wrap my head around.....

Alright enough of this sad shit....on a brighter note......to compensate for these traumatic events...I realized I've been turning to retail therapy...hahhaa....I've been splurging on whatever stuff I ever wanted to buy.....hahhaha....hell it keeps me happy as a hog in mud....ahhaha....I've gotten statues,dvds,figurines,books,comics by the busload........I'm like on a DVD watching spree...recently I watched some really classic movies on DVD....Robert deniro's Taxi Driver,Raging Bull, Francis Coppola's Apocalypse Now, The Nightmare Before Christmas special edition,The Corpse Bride,Munich..........I even watched Stephen King's "IT" with that scary-ass clown Pennywise for the first time in 10 years.....boy was that a treat....that goddamn clown is still so damn freaking scary man after all this years...hahhaha.....oh and I finally watched the final Season of Justice league and bought the Justice League Season 1 boxed set.....

I've also managed to catch a number of films in the cinemas......King Kong, V for Vendetta,Ultra violet(Pure shite!!) and most recently Election 2......I watched not a whole lotta movies so far but well the year is still young....lots of good flicks I'm interested in like X-men 3 and Superman Returns...so that's something to look forward in the future....... check out the seasame street version of V for vendetta in this hilarious parody trailer: C for cookie

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9rzMaAucI4&search=c%20for%20cookie


Also I bought all sort of cool shit for myself......I've gotten two Batman Black and White Statues, A freaking awesome looking and heavy Cold Cast porcelain Bust of Captain America,A batman Kubrick, Big Justice league Display figurines, A wooden Artist mannequin and the coolest item of all: Electric Chair Marv..........

You know there's this guy called Marv in sin city the movie?Well he was electrocuted to death on the electric chair in the movie and that's exactly what I bought....this figure comes mounted on an electric chair.....four interchageable heads...a normal head,a burnt hear,a translucent head and a translucent skull and the electric chair comes with this switch....what you do is you flip the switch for the elctric chair down and the figure says"Get a move on!I haven't got all night!!" and the figure starts vibrating and convulsing and his head glows with a sickening blue light going through him and after that he says :"Its that he best you can do you pansies?!" ......flip the switch over and over again to electrocute the poor bastard repeatedly.....ahhhaa...Electric chair Marv is like the ultimate interactive stress doll for the 21st century...instead of venting your stress and anger on a stress ball....you can freaking electrocute this figure and watch him convulse...hahhaa.......it's sick,its twisted..........I LOVE it.....hahaha.....it really works too!! Everytime I book out in a rage after a 3hr torture session.....I just imagine my T.O as marv...then turn Electric Chair Marv on and throw the switch and watch him get fried......I can't help but smile...its twisted but funny as hell.......very therapeutic...hahha......I kid..I kid.anyway its just a really unique and quirky toy....haha..check it out:

http://images.google.com.sg/imgres?imgurl=http://www.forbiddenplanet.co.uk/images/C/C8500.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.forbiddenplanet.co.uk/index.php%3Fmain_page%3Dproduct_info%26products_id%3D8974&h=588&w=367&sz=67&tbnid=VmpoIEsgRmAwCM:&tbnh=132&tbnw=82&hl=en&start=13&prev=/images%3Fq%3Delectric%2Bchair%2Bmarv%26svnum%3D10%26hl%3Den%26lr%3D%26sa%3DN

So those are the little insignificant stuff that makes me laugh and keeps things interesting for me...haha......also I can't wait to get started drawing Full Time again......I'm just aching to draw my own comic again.....I've been experimenting with all sorts of new techniques like this grey,tonal ink wash I use on all my drawings now that give it a really nice look,I also like drawing in this new Black and White Chiaroscuro art style.....My art looks completely different from the more detail oriented stuff I've been doing this last couple of years.....its nice to play around with new techniques and drawing styles......being experimental is good......I think Once I ORD or towards my ORD date...I wanna write,draw,ink and letter this 150 page Batman story I have in mind.....my most ambitious piece of work yet ...the last time I drew a comic.....I konked out after 40 pages and like 15 pages of additional character sketches.......by the time I ORD, I would have been well-rested and my art should be a few levels above my normal stuff, I would have nailed down the story of the project and have a very good idea on how I'm gonna draw the damn thing...........it'll be fun..it's gonna be good stuff....darker,more atmospheric and provocative then what I normally do...

So I think I ranted long enough.......hope this 4 1/2 mths pass quick.....got some interesting stuff on the horizon.......Felix's 21st Birthday is coming.....X-men 3 is coming....Superman Returns too....plus Season two of Juctice league is gonna be out soon!!! hahhaha........its stuff like this that makes the time pass faster and smoother......nothing like grown men and women in ridiculous spandex and gaudily colored underwears on the outside to brighten up my day....ahhaha....if you're thinking I might be irrevocably insane at this point in time........you could be right...hahaha

Anyways Here's hoping that the next blog entry I write will be a less depressing entry.......and a happier one with all my trademark sarcasm intact........hahahah........ah what the hell you know there'll probably be new shit for me to bitch about by then...hahaha...well...Alright for now.....I'm signing off...

10:02 AM